Amy Louise Irving

A Bit Of Everything Blogger

Monday, 6 May 2019

06/05/2019 - needing to learn to grieve



Before I start quickly, you may notice the date on this blog post, this is because I wrote it when all these thoughts were fresh in my head and although I am publishing it now, I still feel a lot of the same emotions as I did just short of two months ago.

Okay, well, if you don’t already know, my Dad passed away in the middle of November, we are not sure of the underlying cause of death (since we haven’t been told), but I know that before he died, he was really ill. 2017 was the year that he really deteriorated, I tried to put myself in the mental space to prepare for the death, but honestly, no matter how much you try, you can’t ever prepare yourself for something like that.

My dad meant the world to me and he did a lot for me, my mum and my sister (as we all have the same medical condition), he got onto all the right doctors and professionals and made sure we got seen by all the right people at the right time etc. I will really hold my hands out and say he was the best Dad I could ever have. I couldn’t ask for anyone better.

However, now I am just in the thought process of grief, I don’t think the thoughts ever go away, like what if he was seen by professionals sooner but he was very ill, I don’t think there’s much they could have done. I will forever grateful for the NHS and free health care.

Grieving is such a hard process to put yourself through, no one should ever have to go through that but unfortunately it does happen, people die everyday and there’s nothing you can do about it, all you can do is have people around you that are going to be there for you through your low points, and your high points, losing a parent is the worst, but don’t be afraid to ask for help, don’t be afraid to call the helplines, reach out to friends, family, people who care about you, you don’t have to do it alone, I am always here for anyone who needs me to talk too.

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